Male victims of domestic violence 'too ashamed' to come forward - and they don't get equal treatement says councillor

By Christine Sexton - Local Democracy Reporter

14th Dec 2022 | Local News

Cllr Shane Ralph.
Cllr Shane Ralph.

MALE victims of domestic abuse are suffering in silence because the stigma of being attacked by a woman means they have to "deal with it", a Thurrock councillor has claimed

At a meeting of Thurrock Council's health and wellbeing board, Jo Broadbent, director of public health, gave a report on housing and measures being taken to deal with homelessness and its causes.

Cllr Shane Ralph said he had recently dealt with a case of a man suffering domestic abuse that showed there was no level playing field with male victims of domestic violence.

Cllr Ralph said: "There is a different standard of care that is given to a lady who has been abused in domestic violence. They are sent to the women's refuge. This gentleman was offered a Premier Inn room. No support network. Nothing.

"When we talk about levelling up it really does need to be level. For three years I've been going on about having a male shelter. We brought male domestic support units in to talk. Nothing has changed."

Cllr Ralph, who is also a member of the hidden and extreme harms prevention committee, added: "We need to be providing this service with support in Thurrock. A lot more men will come forward from what they are suffering if they know the support is out there. We are not doing it."

"Society is still of the view that if you are a man you have to deal with it. Men still find it very difficult to come forward and talk about being beaten up at home. They are ashamed of coming forward."

Responding at the meeting on Friday, Ewelina Sorbjan, Thurrock's interim director of housing, said: "We don't have a shelter for male victims of domestic abuse. We come across those cases every now and then and we absolutely are prepared to place anyone who is at risk of domestic abuse in a safe place. Our service is equipped to deal with that."

"If we know there is a danger we really would work at very short notice to take the person to the nearest available location that is safe and very often it is a hotel that gets used for the first night but that doesn't mean the person will stay there for a long period."

     

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