Celebrating Mother’s Day as a foster carer - timely focus and tribute to borough folk making a difference
MOTHER'S Day is a time for celebration, reflection, and gratitude. But for foster carers, it can also be a delicate balance of making the day special for the children in their care while also receiving love and appreciation for the important role they play in the child's life.
Ahead of the big day tomorrow (Sunday, 30 March) some of the borough's foster carers talk about what Mother's Day means to them.
Caroline's blended family celebration
For Caroline Bernard, Mother's Day is a joyful occasion where her foster children and her own daughters come together.
She said: "Mother's Day is special for me because my growing blended family is all together. We enjoy dinner, go for walks with our dogs, and maybe watch a film. It's all about being together, not just on this day but every day."
Being a mother figure to her foster children is something Caroline cherishes deeply.
"I feel proud and grateful to give them a loving home filled with fun and laughter."
While she embraces the joy of the Mother's Day, and the role she plays in her foster child's life, Caroline also makes sure that her foster children have the opportunity to recognise their birth mothers.
"I encourage them to buy a card and flowers, even if their contact day isn't on Mother's Day itself."
Lesley - Making special memories
For Lesley Love, Mother's Day is both a time of appreciation and a moment of reflection.
She said: "It's a lovely day to think about what mothers do for us and to thank them.
"We go to church, and the children often give their mums little gifts like daffodils."
Lesley understands that the day can be difficult for the children in her care, so she helps them prepare special presents for their birth mothers.
"Last year, we decorated wooden hearts with their photos. This year, we ordered personalized Mother's Day cards."
Being a foster carer is an emotional journey, but Lesley finds it deeply rewarding.
"When children first come to you, they're often scared and vulnerable. Building trust and seeing them flourish is the best part of fostering.
"At the end of each day, when the children say, 'I love you, Lesley,' it makes everything worth it."
Claire's growing family
For Claire Wright, fostering has simply meant an extension of her family.
She said: "These children just need love and care. I nurture and guide them, and I'm there to give them hugs when needed."
Like many foster carers, Claire helps the children prepare gifts for their birth mothers, whether that's crafting something of their own or picking out a thoughtful gift at the shops.
Her own children also include her foster children in their celebrations.
"On Mother's Day, the whole family gets together—grandparents, aunts, uncles—and we celebrate together."
Claire loves to see her foster children thrive and stays connected with some of the children she has cared for in the past.
"I still keep in touch with some of the children I fostered, who were later adopted. My family just keeps getting bigger!
"I wouldn't change a thing about fostering, except that I wish I had started sooner."
Jenny - Finding beauty in small moments
Jenny Josling has seen firsthand how small gestures can make a big difference.
She said: "When I first started fostering, my own children were young, and we would celebrate as a family. Now, I always make sure the children's birth mums receive cards, flowers, or a small gift. It helps the child feel at ease knowing that their mum is recognised too."
For Jenny, being a foster carer is about giving children the love and stability they need.
"I describe children like flowers, they arrive closed, but then they bloom. Seeing that transformation is the most beautiful part of fostering."
"We once had a little boy who hadn't smiled in a long time. One day, he was laughing on the trampoline, and his older sister turned to me and said, 'Jenny, you've given my brother the ability to laugh again.' I went inside and cried because I realized just how much small moments can mean."
Foster with Thurrock
Fostering through Thurrock Council helps your local Children's Services to keep children rooted in their community, and close to their friends and family.
Foster carers with Thurrock Council also benefit from a great support network, in-depth training and financial help.
If you're interested in finding out more about becoming a foster carer, read more about what is involved on the Thurrock Council Fostering webpage or call 0800 652 1256
Many of Thurrock's foster carers were honoured at a recent celebration evening. Read about it and hear tributes via this link.
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